How to Improve Your Emotional Intelligence, According to Science

Managing emotions effectively can be a challenge, especially in high-pressure environments like the workplace. It’s common to react in ways we later regret or let negative feelings impact our interactions with others. While many of us believe we should leave emotions behind when we enter our professional spaces, it’s not always that simple. Research highlights the importance of emotional intelligence in improving our focus, relationships, and overall well-being. Hence, here are three research-backed exercises curated by Emma Seppälä, a faculty member at the Yale School of Management, to help you boost your emotional intelligence and manage your emotions more effectively:

1. Enhance Self-Awareness with a Quick Check-In

Understanding your emotional state is crucial for managing your reactions and interactions. Self-awareness helps you recognise how you’re feeling and how it might affect your behaviour. To boost your self-awareness, try this simple exercise:

  • Find a Quiet Space: Sit down and close your eyes to minimise distractions.
  • Assess Your Body’s State: On a scale from very tired to very energised, where do you fall today? Notice any physical sensations such as hunger or tension.
  • Evaluate Your Thoughts: Imagine your thoughts as cars on a road. Is your mental traffic heavy or light?
  • Identify Your Emotions: Are you feeling pleasant or unpleasant? How intense are these emotions?

By regularly practising this exercise, you can gauge your mental and emotional state quickly. For instance, if you’re feeling stressed before an important meeting, this exercise can help you decide whether to reschedule or take steps to improve your state of mind beforehand.


2. Use Breathing Techniques to Self-Regulate

Breathing exercises are a powerful tool for managing emotions in real-time. Research from Yale University and other studies demonstrates that controlled breathing can quickly reduce stress and anxiety. Here’s a simple technique:

  • Close Your Eyes: Focus on your breathing.
  • Inhale Slowly: Breathe in through your nose for a count of four.
  • Exhale Slowly: Breathe out through your mouth for a count of eight.

Practising this for just a few minutes can activate your parasympathetic nervous system, which helps calm your body and mind. This technique is especially useful before presentations or during stressful meetings to maintain composure and clarity.


3. Create Positive Connections with Micro-Moments of Upliftment

Interacting positively with others not only boosts their mood but also enhances your own well-being. Positive energisers use small, genuine gestures to uplift those around them. Here’s how you can incorporate micro-moments of upliftment:

  • Offer a Genuine Compliment: Acknowledge someone’s effort or achievement.
  • Share a Laugh: Find humour in everyday situations.
  • Express Compassion: Show understanding and empathy.

Research indicates that these small acts of kindness can significantly impact both your and others’ emotional states, fostering a more supportive and productive environment.


Developing emotional intelligence is a continuous process that involves improving self-awareness, regulating your emotions, and fostering positive connections. By integrating these exercises into your routine, you can enhance your interactions, reduce stress, and contribute to a more positive work environment. For a deeper dive into emotional intelligence, consider exploring regular meditation, which has been shown to strengthen self-control and self-awareness, further supporting your journey toward emotional mastery.

Ready to boost your emotional intelligence?

If you’re looking to improve your emotional intelligence and manage your emotions more effectively, these exercises are a great starting point. For personalised guidance and strategies, consider working with a coach who can help you develop these skills further. Embrace the opportunity to enhance your emotional intelligence and transform your professional and personal interactions.


References:

Seppälä, E. (2024, June 26). 3 Exercises to Boost Your Emotional Intelligence, According to Research. Harvard Business Review.

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